Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

Joy to the world! The Lord has come.

Let earth receive her King.

Let every heart prepare Him room.

Let Heaven and nature sing.

Petey had a very special first Christmas, celebrating our Savior's birth with us, his Honey & Ozzie (Matt's parents), his aunt, uncle and four cousins. All twelve of us celebrated Christmas Eve at church last night. Here is a photo of the Osman family taken before the service began:

We began Christmas morning at our house and Noah was so sweet helping Peter open his presents:

We then joined the rest of the family at Matt's parents' home, where the festivities continued until bedtime. The best part of the day was seeing all the cousins playing together all day long. It was a day filled with special memories, and my heart overflows with joy!

Dedication

Train up a child in the way he should go;

Even when he is old he will not depart from it.

~Proverbs 22:6

Today at church, we had the honor and privilege of dedicating Peter to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. 

Here is the prayer that Matt prayed during the dedication:

Zephaniah 3:17

The Lord your God is with you,

he is mighty to save.

He will take great delight in you,

he will quiet you with his love,

he will rejoice over you with singing.

Dear Father in Heaven,

We take great delight in Peter, just as You take great delight in him. And we rejoice over him becoming a part of our family, just as You rejoice over Your children.

Lord, thank You for saving us, and please work in Peter's heart as he grows older and gains understanding, that he, too, would  find a saving grace in You. Lord, please bless us with wisdom and insight to raise him in a godly manner consistent with Your plan for our lives.

Lord, we also pray for Peter's birth family, in particular his birth mother. We pray that somehow, someway, she would find a peace that passes all understanding and know in her heart that Peter is happy and loved and that we, his forever family, will care for his every need.

Thank You Lord for blessing our family with Peter.

In Jesus name we pray, Amen

The ceremony began with a renewal of marriage vows. Here we are praying, following the vow renewal.

During the ceremony, Pastor Robbi talked with Noah about being the kind of big brother who exemplifies Jesus.

Then, Pastor Robbi anointed Peter with oil as we dedicated him to the Lord, promising to raise him according to God's word and way.  

 What a special and blessed day for our family. 

Tactile Play

I'm writing this blog post in hopes that it may help another little guy or gal as these activities have helped Petey. At the suggestion of Petey's speech therapist, I have increased tactile play activities in order to increase his attention span, which is usually about 30 seconds. He loves manipulating his hands around in various textures (mostly slimy). Everything I've used is non-toxic and many are food items. Here are a couple examples.

I started with pumpkin guts and he played with them for 37 minutes the first time and 50 minutes the second time. Absolutely amazing!

An unexpected bonus when Petey played with pudding was that he succeeded in using a spoon to feed himself for the first time! (He has fed himself independently since a few days after he joined our family, but always with his fingers.)

In related news, Petey also learned to use a fork to feed himself yesterday. Granted, he only ate about 10% of the food with the fork and used his hands for the rest, but I'm so proud of him for learning these new skills.

~Allie

A Season of Thanksgiving

"Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good, 

For His lovingkindness is everlasting."

~Psalm 136:1

We have so much to be thankful for this year: the addition of Peter to our family, our new home, and the family and friends who have blessed us in so many ways.

This was Peter's first Thanksgiving ever and our family's first Thanksgiving in our new home. We had the great fortune of hosting four generations of family. Petey's favorite part of the holiday was playing with his Grammy (Allie's mom), whom he grew to know and love during her five-day visit. He also enjoyed eating multiple helpings of Matt's delicious smoked turkey during Thanksgiving dinner!

Here are some pictures from our holiday:

 

Sweety Petey had a happy birthday!

We were so blessed to celebrate Peter's 3rd birthday with him; his first birthday that we've had the privilege of celebrating together!

Our family of four went to Grand Asia Market and ate lunch in their restaurant with Matt's parents and grandma. They serve absolutely delicious, authentic Chinese food, and Petey chowed down on his favorite treat there - steamed buns filled with bbq pork. After lunch, we walked around the market and checked out the fresh seafood, which we thoroughly enjoy doing every time we go. The boys are fascinated by the tanks of tilapia, eels, lobsters and monk fish; the bins of turtles, crabs, frogs and conch; and tons more fish and shellfish. Noah was especially excited about the mini sharks!

Peter also enjoyed playing with his presents from family and friends, which he opened first thing in the morning. When we first gave him the wooden croaking frog that we bought for him in China, he got so excited about it that he ran around the room smiling and laughing. It made us wonder if he has some memory of something like it from when he lived in China. 

Happy Halloween!

The Boys' First Halloween Together

Petey enjoyed playing with the pumpkin guts while Noah "helped" Daddy carve
the jack-o'-lanterns.

Jack-o'-Lanterns: The Finished Products

(Noah is making his "Halloween Face")

Trick-or-Treating: So Much Fun!

Checking in

Peter continues to do well and we see incremental progress on an almost daily basis.  He has speech therapy once a week, and although he is not yet talking, his comprehension of what we say to him is increasing.  Peter can now touch his foot and belly when prompted and has finally shown an interest in books, even if his attention span remains very, very short.  He will let me (Matt) read a short book to him, and if I recite the first line of his favorite one, he will go and find that book and bring it to me and then climb into my lap while I read it.  Just today, he demonstrated that if we say the first lines of his two other favorite books, he will go get them, as well. It is very exciting to see his recognition of English grow.

And even though Peter doesn't yet speak, he definitely knows how to let us know what he wants.  He doesn't yet have the fine motor skills necessary to put together duplo Legos, but he will hand you a piece and show you where he wants it.   He also lets you know when he wants food (which is pretty much all of the time) and what he wants by going to the pantry and digging something out.  When he does this, we say that "Petey is going shopping."

There are still so many things to work on, including simple skills like learning to drink through a straw.  While he is nearly 3 years old, he is much younger developmentally. But we are confident that Peter will continue to grow and develop at the same steady pace he has shown since Gotcha Day in May.

Peter continues to show excellent attachment, especially with Allie and Noah, but we were recently reminded that we still have a ways to go when it comes to new places and crowds.  A couple of weekends ago we took Peter to a "wing off" at the house of some friends from church (I took 2nd place with my lemon pepper smoked wings, or "Lemony Smokeit" wings).  It was a lot of fun but proved to be too much for Peter with too many new faces in an unfamiliar place.  The next morning my parents watched him so that Allie and I could attend church together for the first time in several months to hear our worship pastor, Gentry Eddings, speak. Until now, we have taken turns going to church with Noah, while the other parent stays home with Peter.  Peter did great with my parents and it was encouraging to see him so comfortable with them. But when they brought him to church to meet us so that they could attend the next service, he again withdrew and got very small, just as he had the night before.  Both times, he reacted by withdrawing in a way that reminded us all too much of how he was at times in China and for the next few days showed some behavioral regression.  It was hard to see but a good reminder that while Peter has come so far, it will be some time before he is comfortable in those settings.   It is great that people who have been following our story want to come up and say hi and interact with Peter, but it is still just too much for so many people to be in his face.  And rather than taking him out and trying to shield him from people who are well-meaning, it is just easier to not put him in those types of situations. We know this won't last forever, but until it improves it is our job to protect him and make sure that he feels safe and secure with us.

Thanks for continuing to follow our journey.  Here are some more recent pictures of our boys:

Visiting Grandma.

At our happy place, Hall Family Farm.

Noah was quite determined to pull the wagon all by himself.

Peter celebrating the Navy's 240th birthday.

Praise God from Whom All Blessings Flow!

Allie here. It has been such an amazing process to feel myself falling in love with little Petey. From the time we received his profile picture from our agency, I loved him through action, through choice, through prayer. Then I emotionally felt love for him. And then I totally fell in love with him and love him as if he has always been mine. It seems like he has been with us for so much longer than four months because he is now so much a part of me and so much a part of our family. Today, I found myself singing a verse from an old Elvis song to Peter, "Like a river flows surely to the sea, darling so it goes, some things are meant to be. Take my hand, take my whole life, too, for I can't help falling in love with you." My heart is just bursting with love for this little boy.

And now for some wonderful news...All of Peter's medical tests and exams have come back totally normal! At the suggestions of Petey's pediatrician and speech therapist, he was seen by a neurologist who said he has no signs of cerebral palsy. The neurologist was so sure that he did not even order an MRI. We were relieved to find out that Petey does not have any degree of CP because much of his institutionalization mimics it, so it had been in question.

The neurologist also said Petey has no signs of chromosomal defect and did not order genetic testing. We were not surprised by this at all, since we never ever thought this was even a possibility.

Since the neurologist was being very thorough in his assessment, he did order an EEG to make sure Petey was not having any mild brain seizures, since he has been known to stare off into space on occasion. The EEG came back normal, thank goodness. Honestly, we never thought his occasional staring was anything more than just that - staring - because staring off into space is what kids in orphanages sometimes do, and Peter has been doing that less and less.

All that to say, Petey's developmental delays are solely due to institutionalization and he should catch up to his age over time. Praise God! He has already come so far. For example, on Gotcha Day, he was barely walking - more of a few steps, stagger and fall routine. Now he walks very steadily, sort of runs, and even climbs the playground ladder (with a spotter, of course) and slides down the slide!

Peter's final exam was by a pediatric ophthalmologist, also suggested by his speech therapist, who said his vision and eye health is fine. Also, praise God! I am so glad that Petey is done with all these medical exams. While I completely understand why we had to have them done, seeing as he has no actual medical history and we had to know exactly what is going on so we can help him learn and grow to his fullest potential, it is comforting to know that he is now finished with them and he is fine. So many people's prayers have been answered. God is so good.

So, I have to write about my favorite thing Petey does right now. When we're playing on the floor together -- picture this -- he walks to me, turns around so his back is facing me, backs up until he is pressed against me, plops down in my lap, and snuggles in. Love it!!!

Petey was such a trooper during his EEG! He was so cooperative.

Our happy little mummy :-)

Peter spent almost all of the 45 minutes snacking in his stroller and then conveniently took a little nap. 

Is there anything cuter than fuzzy footie pajamas?

The boys being boys.

If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands!

Peter started clapping his hands yesterday and has been doing so today like it's his job. It makes me so happy to see the smile on his face when he's clapping and to see him develop this cognitive and motor milestone. He claps mainly when listening to music while we are driving in the car and when he gets excited about something while we're playing. Sometimes he just does it because it is something new to do. Whatever the reason, it brings me great happiness to see him clapping his hands.

It has been about three and a half months since Gotcha Day and while this whole journey has been extremely rewarding, I have to admit it has not been a cake walk. I never want to complain, because I know God has blessed me beyond measure. However, the past several months have been a real challenge for us and we want to be honest about that. I write this because I was recently reminded that it is OK to admit that I'm not always OK and Matt has been encouraging me to share our struggles.

For several months leading up to Gotcha Day, my anxiety level was at an all-time high. Not about the adoption, but about a hundred other things that have never come to fruition. While it has calmed down some, it has not nearly subsided as much as I need it to. I remind myself that nothing I am ever anxious about ever actually materializes, but that does not seem to help at the moment.

Aside from anxiety (always in relation to my children), the biggest struggle for me has been going from Mom to Referee.

As a mother of one, my relationship with my first child was absolutely amazing. And I recognize how easy I had it. Now, I feel like I am constantly trying to figure out how to balance the desires and wills of a three-year-old and a two-year-old who both want all of my attention at the same time. While I try to do my best for them every day, I have not yet figured out the balance and it tears at my heart. I am told I am too hard on myself, but raising my two children is the most important thing I have ever and will ever do - I just want to give them the best childhood (including the best me) that I can. Many days, though, my emotions are raw and I am mentally exhausted.

In all of the training, reading and talking with adoptive families that we did prior to Gotcha Day, the one thing we were never warned about was the impact of the adoption on our biological child. Everything and everyone talked about the adopted child. What we were not prepared for was the regression displayed by our biological son. The time period when he stopped talking because Peter can not talk. The grunting and groaning because that is the way Peter communicates. The increased whining, disobedience and rebellion in response to now having to share my attention. I know that none of this is unique, but it is still difficult. It is not all the time, but it is still trying, frustrating and draining.

I must compliment Noah's patience with Peter's intense, frenzied, loud and incessant groaning in relation to his food obsession, and his way to express impatience for any reason because he can not communicate verbally yet. But even though Noah is so patient with it, I know it must wear on his nerves, because it frays ours.

For Matt, attachment has been a major issue -- both Peter attaching to Matt and Matt attaching to Peter. This is very common and is something that we both read about and were told to expect, but that has not made it any easier on either of them.

Honestly, integrating our adopted two and a half year old (who is developmentally around 12 months old) into our family is by far the most difficult thing we have ever done -- and I went to the Naval Academy and we both served in the Navy, for goodness sake!

All that to say, I love my family of four beyond words and am working hard at it, but this season in our lives presents daily struggles. When people ask how it is going and want a response consisting of a smile with an 'it's going great,' - well, it is going great, but that is not the whole story and does not even scratch the surface.

I write this not to complain, because like I said before, I dearly love my family, I know I am blessed, and I do not for a moment regret our decision to adopt. I write this to be real, honest, transparent, and admit that it is not all rainbows and unicorns.

Now that I am mentally fried from publicly laying all that out there, here are some pictures of my little loves: