Petey's Big Day!

Petey attended Sunday school! This may not seem like a big deal, but it is huge! For a year, we had been working up to this day, and two Sundays ago Petey surprised us by going into the classroom on his own and successfully staying through the entire class.

A year ago, just being at church around so many unfamiliar adults was too overwhelming for him, so for months and months Matt and I took turns going to church with Noah, while the other stayed home with Petey. Then, for a few weeks, we took turns taking him to a church nursery class that matched his developmental age at the time and staying with him for the duration of the service, only stepping out once or twice for a couple minutes to see how he would react. Worse than crying, he would go sit against a wall and mentally retreat. So, we stopped doing that. Then, for several weeks, we kept Petey in the sanctuary with us for the music/singing and took turns taking him into the lobby where we could listen to the sermon and watch Petey as he explored. 

Two weeks ago, I took Petey into the sanctuary to find seats and listen to the pre-service music while Matt checked Noah into his class. Petey was not having it, so I walked him out. Instead of just walking out to the lobby, he turned down the hallway to "kids church." I let him lead the way and followed along with him. He walked to the classroom we had experimented with, looked around, left, and continued down the hallway. He stopped at Noah's classroom and checked things out. Then, he turned down another corridor to more classrooms. At this point, the leader of the kids programs saw us and asked if I was going to put Petey in a class. I told her that I was going to let him decide. Smartly, she opened the door to a class of two-year-olds where she knew the teacher would be a wonderful match for him. Petey walked in on his own, explored, looked back at me, held my gaze for a moment, and then went off to explore and play some more. After I talked with the teacher for a while about Petey, I went back to the sanctuary and Petey stayed in Sunday school! Matt went to check on him (without Petey spotting him) half-way through the service and Petey was doing well. When we picked him up, he was sitting at a little table with the other children and I could tell that he was watching the other children to gauge what to do. He had successfully navigated an art project (with one on one assistance) about creation, playground time and snack time. I was so proud of him, I wanted to shout it from the mountain tops!

We knew that the next week would be the true test, though, of whether Petey would successfully repeat the experience, knowing what he was getting into. Again, he was a champ! Here is a photo I took of him going down a slide when I popped out to check on him (again, without him spotting me). 

This is a huge milestone, not only for what it is, but for what it forecasts -- we now think he is ready to start preschool next year and have enrolled him at the same preschool Noah attends. Petey will attend two mornings per week and will be in a two-year-old class, based on his abilities. We are hopeful that he will feel comfortable there because he is so familiar with the school. And we are hopeful that being in preschool with other classmates and peers will encourage him to talk, since he is still nonverbal. We are also extremely thankful and grateful to the director for working with us to meet Peter's educational needs! 

Here are some other pics of Petey enjoying the outdoors with us:

  

 

One Year Today!

One year ago today, we held Petey in our arms for the first time and we became a family of four. I will always remember how tiny he was, and it still brings tears to my eyes thinking about how confused, scared and sad he was because he didn't understand what was going on, except that he was being handed over to people he had never seen before, who looked very different than his caregivers, and who were speaking a language he didn't understand. But I will also always remember how shortly after he finally let me hold him at the orphanage, he decided to trust me - he snuggled into my arms, let me feed him a bottle, fell asleep in my arms out of pure emotional exhaustion, sat on my lap at a restaurant and let me spoon feed him, and slept best in the hotels if he was laying on me, clinging to me. It was such a very emotional time for all of us. I will never forget the relief I felt a couple days into our adventure, when he smiled when I tickled him, smiled at the sight of us, and humorously knew to smile for photos. When he began to smile, I knew he was happy, and that made my heart glad.

In most ways, it feels to me like Petey has been our son for his entire life. He is part of me. When we think back at our time in China, think about all that has happened since then, and look at the photos that tell our story, it is amazing to think it began just one year ago today.

Looking at Petey on Gotcha Day and looking at him today, it is amazing how much he has grown, in so many ways:

Baby in China to Big Boy at home:

I took the first photo the last weekend of May 2015 at a local farm where the kids like to play. I took the second photo this weekend. What a difference a year makes:

 

~Allie

One year (almost!)

It's hard to believe that it's been nearly a year since Peter became ours.  In some ways, it seems like he's been with us for much longer but in other ways it seems like just yesterday that we held him for the first time in Jinan.  As we approach the first anniversary of Gotcha Day, I've been thinking about what that day means and how we will celebrate it, both now and in the future.

We know adoptive families who treat Gotcha Day like a birthday, a true day of celebration.  And in many ways Gotcha Day is just like a birthday, the day that their adopted child has been reborn into their families.  But we know other families for whom Gotcha Day is a low key affair due the memories of grief, trauma and loss that are stirred by remembering the circumstances that brought these children into our lives.

I don't really know how we will celebrate Gotcha Day in the future, especially as Petey grows in awareness and starts to ask the questions that are sure to come, questions for which we have no answers.  But for now we are grateful that he is part of our family and we hope that he is as blessed by our family as we have been by him.

~Matt

Keeping the beat in music class